I got something exciting in the mail yesterday. It wasn't even just a letter, it was a whole package. I love getting news in the mail, and surprise news is even better. I didn't recognize the return address, but that didn't matter. I slit tape and hurriedly opened the cardboard box. The first thing I found was a letter, and out of polite habit, I read it first before diving into the rest of the box.
"And now, life with baby begins."
I read with an ear-to-ear grin.
"The birth of your baby is one of the most important moments in your life," I continued, as my smile slid into a perplexed expression that took over my entire face.
I stopped reading and let my eyes shift back and forth as I tried to remember whether I might have actually forgotten this most important moment. I hoped that the letter might have some more information, so I kept reading.
"And with the arrival of your little bundle of joy come feedings, and lots of them."
My confusion transformed to complete panic and I threw down the letter, letting newborn maternal instincts resurface. I ran through the house checking under couches and searching through covers on the beds. I opened closets and dumped out the laundry baskets. In each room I ran into one of my three kids, ranging in age from 4-9, and they each queried about what I was looking for.
"Apparently, we just had a baby," I said breathlessly,"...I think maybe I forgot about it, and I guess it might be hungry."
They each shrugged off my ridiculous ranting...as if they were kindof used to it, and I continued with my search. The effort was futile, and after silencing any noise in the house, I sat for a moment to see if I could hear the newborn cries of a hungry baby....nothing.
Then it hit me...maybe the baby was in the box!
I ran back to the counter, where I had left the package, and I quickly opened it. I held my breath as I reached in and discovered the two cans of formula that had been packed inside.
My husband came in as I pulled them out, and he commented, "is there something you're not telling me?"
"I don't think so...Have you seen a baby around here?"
"No" he said tilting his head in curiosity.
"Was I pregnant at all the last nine months and maybe I was just too busy to notice?"
"No, I'm pretty sure I would have caught that one," he said.
"Oh...okay," I said letting the anxious tension fade from my shoulders.
"I guess there must have been some sort of mistake...whew. I knew we were busy, but why in the world would the Similac people spend all that money to send me formula, unless they knew important baby news?"
"There isn't any news... right?" my huband hesitated as he asked.
"No," I hugged him. "Barring any real baby surprises, we are still just a family of five. Except, you know what," I let my arms extend as I leaned away from him, "we are now a family of five armed with a couple cans of formula in case a wandering baby ever actually does show up on the doorstep."
Good news came in the mail yesterday...it was just meant for someone else.
HEY!!! I got some Enfamil in the mail too!! Except it was for toddlers. My friend ALSO got a can!! I wonder what is up Enfamil's sleeve.....hmmmmm....what kind of marketing ploy are they up to? Whatever it is it is NOT making me want another baby that's FOR SURE!! Maybe we could gather all of these unwanted/ not needed cans of formula that have been sent to countless people and send them all to Haiti???
ReplyDeleteHollie
Colorado
Great Blog Spot. It was fun and funny :)
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious! May they just have a feeling a baby will be on the way? :) And I love your reaction! Hollie does have a great idea about sending them to HAiti. Why not?
ReplyDeleteGreat post!
That was really funny! And suspenseful too. I also like the idea of sending to Haiti - has anyone suggested it to Similac? Are they on Twitter or Facebook?
ReplyDeleteOkay ladies...I took your advice, and I contacted Similac to see if they would consider sending formula to Haiti in place of the advertising ploy that they currently use. I will keep you posted.
ReplyDeleteHa, ha! Cute post, Meagan. And that is an AWESOME idea about sending it to Haiti.
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